December 26, 2004 | Benches | Holga
The most difficult aspect of parenting for me, is not having the time to create. I love to sew, knit, paint, draw, write, take pictures, build ... the list goes on. My brain is always busy working on new ideas, new ways of further developing the skills I have. I lie in bed at night, inventing manuscripts, web site concepts and illustrative embroideries. I grew up in a very domesticated family, learning to cast on before I could spell "cast on". And I take pride in knowing the crafts my mother carefully taught me. But now I suffer angst at not being able to keep up with the flow of my imagination, and not making blueprints into a reality. To be honest, I'm too tired most of the time. I average about five hours sleep per night, due to our daughter being a restless sleeper and early morning riser - sometimes as early as 5am. Don't get me wrong. Raising a daughter is a beautiful thing, and the most creative task I have ever encountered. I would never change my life for a million years. But my morning journal, sketchbook and sewing machine are gathering dust. On hold. Maybe 2005 will give me the ability to multi-task like I have never multi-tasked before.
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